


Nosferatu

by Waltzstein



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, F/F, Mystery, Rated For Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-09-17 23:46:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9351896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waltzstein/pseuds/Waltzstein
Summary: Carmilla Karnstein is a deadly assassin. Laura Hollis is a journalism student trying to find out what happened to her mother. They have nothing in common, save for one moment in their past that would decide everything.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my very first Carmilla fanfic (or fanfic in general, really). I've had the idea for it bubbling in the back of my head for quite some time, but it didn't surface fully-formed until recently.
> 
> I'd like to thank xovortex on tumblr and AO3 for their beta-reading and suggestions. I think the whole story is definitely starting to come together.
> 
> Feedback is greatly appreciated, as are kudos. You can also message me on my tumblr (same username: waltzstein). Enjoy!
> 
> \---
> 
> Listen While You Read: "A Little Death" by The Neighbourhood

Mircalla remembered the day it happened. It had been four long years since Mother had taken her in from the streets she had been calling home. Four years since Mother had first begun training her, turning her into the perfect killer. But four years had also rendered her a powerless monster that did Mother’s bidding day after day, working in the shadows to eliminate the targets that were deemed a threat to the wealthy businessmen and politicians that controlled the city of Silas.

After being summoned to the main hall for a new assignment, Mircalla headed out with a fellow clanmate, Matska Belmonde, who had been designated her partner for the contract. The two assassins were charged with eliminating a married couple that would be visiting during the upcoming weekend. They would have from the moment the targets set foot within the city to the time they left to complete the assignment, as was declared by the ancient law. So long as someone entered the boundaries of Silas, they were fair game for the criminals and crooks of the city. The law had been set in place centuries ago, when evil and corruption first began oozing into the corners of what at the time was a small town, now leaving a dark haze over the vast, sprawling metropolis. This was the compromise made to keep the turpitude from reaching the neighboring towns and cities.

At first glance, Silas was like any other large city, if not better in some aspects. The parks and public facilities were well looked after, and the subways always ran on time. The local schools were of high quality, including the local university, whose professors had won several awards for their research over many years. There was the unavoidable litter, pollution, and homelessness, but it was difficult for any sizeable city to be rid of such problems. What set Silas apart from its neighbors, however, was what hid underneath the green parks and shiny subway cars. The inhabitants of Silas believed that a curse had taken hold of the city long ago. People disappeared from their families without a trace, and it wasn’t uncommon to read about the latest suicide in the newspaper. Mircalla knew better than to believe in nonsense like curses, but whether she liked it or not, she was an essential piece in the puzzle of an untold evil.

The two assassins had a few days to mull over the new contract and make preparations. What struck Mircalla as odd about the targets was how much they differed from any other assignment she had carried out in the past. Seeing as no one ever entered Silas, and many left the first chance they got once they realized the danger they were in, the couple’s visit was an oddity in and of itself. Even more strange was the fact that they seemed to have little or no connections to the high-ranking elites of the city, no clear reason for them to become yet another target of Mother’s organization. The more she thought about it, the more Mircalla realized there might be a way to warn the couple of their danger and make it seem as if they had departed early of their own volition. Despite being rare, failed contracts still occurred, and their presumed unimportance convinced Mircalla that she could undermine the assignment and avoid punishment.

Early in the morning on the day of the couple’s arrival, Mircalla bribed a conductor at the train station to deliver a note to the two when they arrived. She regrouped with Mattie later to tail the couple, her partner completely unaware of Mircalla’s intentions. It seemed as if the couple had never received the warning, until at last, near the end of the day, they stopped at a police station. Mattie found this suspicious, suspecting that she and Mircalla had been spotted somehow. They returned to the compound to report to Mother and await the following day, the last opportunity they would have before the contract was terminated when the couple left the city.

Mircalla and Mattie sat on two benches at opposite ends of the train platform, as was Mother’s instruction after Mattie had informed her of the couple’s peculiar activities the previous day. Mircalla eventually spotted the targets as they entered the station. Mattie noticed as well, and when the wife left her husband for a moment and headed in the general direction of the restrooms, she immediately followed after the woman. Mattie being equally as experienced as her partner, Mircalla knew that the woman was as good as gone. With little time to formulate a proper plan to save the husband, she did the only thing she could think of in the moment. She approached the man, intentionally bumping into him and “dropping” a train ticket while knocking his own out of his hand. Mircalla apologized profusely as she swapped their tickets. When the man checked his new ticket and realized that the final call had just been announced for his train, he rushed off to the platform, hoping his wife would do the same when she returned. Mircalla waited for Mattie to reappear and they left the station, each assuming that the other had successfully eliminated their respective targets.

\---

Late that evening, Mircalla was called to the main hall by Mother. This was typical after each contract, but after entering the vaulted room, she could tell something was off. The air was too still, too quiet, and goosebumps immediately dotted the surface of her arms. Mother stood at the end of the room with an icy expression on her face. Another one of her siblings, a new recruit by the name of Will Luce, stood beside her looking smug as ever. More of Mircalla’s brothers and sisters were gathered in the vaulted room than was typical, and she felt as if the walls were slowly closing in on her. The moment she stopped walking, two of her brothers had her arms locked behind her in an instant. Unable to break the hold, she stood there begrudgingly as Will explained that he had been told to follow the two assassins after Mother received yesterday’s report, and had seen the entire exchange between Mircalla and her target. Her blood turned cold when Mother ordered a girl brought into the hall. Even with the hood over her head, Mircalla knew by the slope of her shoulders and the shape of her hands that the girl standing before her was Ell, the only girl in this twisted world she had ever dared to love.

Mircalla had worked so hard to keep a dark part of herself secret from Ell, always making up excuses for all the times she’d have to cut their dates short because something had come up. When the hood was pulled from her head, the look on Ell’s face changed rapidly from recognition and relief to overwhelming betrayal as she put two and two together. Mircalla didn’t know what hurt more: the knowledge of what was about to happen, or the look in Ell’s eyes that cut right to her soul.

In one swift move Will inserted a small knife into Ell’s back, the light slowly leaving the girl’s eyes forever. A scream tore from Mircalla’s throat as she thrashed around, trying to get to the girl. It wasn’t until Ell had been removed from the room that Mircalla was released from her hold. She slumped to the ground, her will to fight back having been replaced with a vast feeling of emptiness. She knew that Ell had received more than one stab in the back that night.

“Sorry kitty,” came Will’s sarcastic response.

Mircalla couldn’t remember how long she stayed there on the ground, staring at her hands like they might be able to bring Ell back.

When a monster stopped behaving like a monster, what happened to it? Mircalla now had her answer, it seemed. A monster never stopped being one. It merely turned colder and meaner after every failed attempt at trying to become what it was not. Mircalla had tried and failed one too many times, and so she resolved to never make the mistake of allowing Mother to have that kind of power over her ever again. She let her heart turn to stone, her features changing from their usual challenging smirk to a permanent scowl. It would be almost three years before she ever felt anything even remotely resembling happiness ever again.

 

* * *

 

Laura sprinted around the corner of a building, turning into a narrow side street as her jacket whipped behind her in the wind. Her lungs were screaming and her legs were burning, but she did her best to focus on the pounding of her feet on the pavement and moving as fast as she could. She glanced over her shoulder and saw that her pursuer was quickly gaining on her. _Shit_. She rounded another corner, this time into a dark alleyway, and darted behind a dumpster. She listened as the sound of boots thundered past, then gradually faded altogether. Certain that the man was gone, she carefully moved out from her hiding place, doing her best to move quickly and quietly.

As Laura was about to turn out onto the main boulevard, a brutal force jerked her backwards by the back of her jacket. She flailed, completely off-balanced, and before she could properly brace herself, she connected hard with the cold pavement, pain shooting up her left arm and shoulder. She half-groaned half-wheezed, clutching her arm as she tried to regain the air that had been knocked out of her lungs. Before she could react, a large hand grabbed a fist-full of her shirt, forcing her back to her feet.

“You thought you could get away, sweetheart?” he spat.

Laura flinched and remained silent, unable to answer considering that the hand that gripped her shirt moments ago had migrated up to her throat.

The man tightened his hold, Laura doing her best to pry his fingers off, her vision darkening around the edges. He laughed as he threw her back to the ground and reached inside his coat. Laura slowly began to inch away, bruised and sore after having collided with the ground twice now. She stopped moving the moment she heard the telltale sound of a gun’s hammer clicking into place, afraid that any sudden movement would be her last.

“I’m going to show you what happens to those that don’t mind their own business,” the man leered. Laura saw his demeanor change as he went to squeeze the trigger. She looked away, waiting for the inevitable.

The sound of metal clanging to the ground startled her, and when she looked up the man was now clutching his neck, red blooming from between his fingers and a dark object protruding from just above his shirt collar. As he collapsed to the ground, Laura scrambled backwards in horror, not wanting to see the life drain out of him.

Laura had seen people get killed in movies before, but she had never witnessed a murder firsthand. She crawled off to the side and took deep breaths to avoid getting sick. Trembling from exhaustion and fear, she returned to the man. She decided that leaving the gun would make his death look more like suicide than murder, but would take the knife that had killed him as a way to protect herself from future altercations brought on by her investigative research. Laura took a deep breath and steeled herself before closing her eyes and pulling the blade out in one clean movement. She wiped it on the man’s shirt, not wanting to see what was making her hands sticky.

Laura stood up with some difficulty and left the alleyway, the uncanny feeling that she was being watched making the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. She took a roundabout way back home to throw off anyone that might be following her. When she arrived at her apartment, she crouched down and checked for a toothpick wedged between the metal frame and door that Laura had inserted before she left that evening. It was a simple form of home security her paranoid father taught her almost three years ago after her mother had mysteriously disappeared. Relief washed over her when she found the sliver of wood sticking out from its usual place.

After entering and locking the door behind her, Laura went into the bathroom to wash her hands and face. She stood there for a moment, watching her hands as they continued to shake ever so slightly from the adrenaline that was still coursing through her. She went to make some hot cocoa in her tiny kitchen to calm herself down when she noticed what looked like an envelope pinned to her table with a knife, and not the kind that she had in her silverware drawer.

Unable to free the blade from the wood, she tore the envelope out from underneath and opened it up. She pulled out a folded note and read its scrawled handwriting: _You aren’t safe here_. That was obvious, considering the whole ordeal that took place that night. Next she examined the remaining contents of the package, counting $2500 in cash. After quickly stashing the money in her t-shirt drawer, she walked over to her bed and sank into it face-first. She had no idea who had left the note, what it was referring to, or what the money was for.

As Laura was beginning to drift off to sleep, a single idea popped into her head. She rolled off her bed and padded over to the heap of clothes on her floor. She pulled out the knife she had retrieved in the alleyway from her jacket, and brought it out to the kitchen table to compare it to the knife currently embedded there. A quick examination proved her suspicions to be correct: the knives were identical, down to the small, unidentifiable symbol engraved in the blade near the handle. She slumped down in the chair next to her and groaned, not ready to deal with more of what Silas had in store for her. As pressing as her discovery was, the adrenaline had completely left Laura’s body and was quickly being replaced by pain and exhaustion. She would have to sort this out in the morning.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen While You Read: "The Less I Know The Better" by Tame Impala

Realizing that she had left her wallet at home, Laura made a split-second decision and hopped the subway turnstile. There were far more important things for transit clerks to be concerned with, right? Wrong.

“Hey! Where do you think you’re going?” the uniformed woman yelled over the speakers. 

Unfortunately, the platform at this particular station wasn’t very long, so Laura had nowhere to run. She still had a minute before the next train arrived, and that would be plenty of time for the clerk to exit the booth and come chew her out, or even to call in a police officer and have her arrested. Laura was seriously considering making a run for the exit and hoping that she could outrun anyone that tried to chase her.

When she doubled back to check on the status of her impending doom, she noticed a dark-haired woman dressed in all black walking away from the token booth, carrying what appeared to be a small piece of metal in her hand. Laura stiffened at first, thinking it was a gun or some other weapon. As the stranger paid her own fare and casually made her way to the platform, Laura was able to get a closer look. To her relief, the woman appeared to be holding some kind of handle, one that most likely belonged to the door of the booth that was now violently rattling from the clerk’s attempt to force it open. She watched open-mouthed as the stranger tossed the door lever off to the side, the object sliding a little ways before hitting the tiled subway wall with a thud. The woman then proceeded to lean against a pillar and examine the black paint on her nails, as if this entire procedure were just another part of her morning routine.

“Leather jacket and schoolgirl! If I ever see either of you at this station again, I will  _ personally _ make sure the only car you leave in is a patrol car!” screamed the railroad clerk, her face now red and visibly livid. 

Before the threat could be carried out, a train came screeching to a halt at the station. Laura forced her way into the crowded car, not even bothering to let people off first and receiving several dirty looks in the process. She quickly found something to hold on to before the subway cars sped off into the heart of the city towards the university. Laura looked around, suddenly remembering that she never thanked the dark-haired stranger for their (borderline illegal) act of kindness, and was disappointed to find that the woman had already disappeared amongst the crowd.

Laura pulled her tangled earphones out of a pocket from within her messenger bag, plugging them into her phone and opening up some music. She closed her eyes and did her best to relax, trying not to think about how she was going to deal with the next set of turnstiles when her subway stop rolled around.

A few songs later, Laura felt a tap on her shoulder. Doing her best to turn around in such a tight space, she found herself practically face-to-face with the woman from the station.

“I think you dropped this,” the stranger said, holding out a metro card for Laura to take. Her voice was rough, but with hints of warmth to it.

“Oh, uh, thanks!” Laura stammered. The music in her ears was making her speak louder than she had intended to, and her face flushed a darker shade at the realization, suddenly hyper-aware of her awkwardness. She accepted the card with a shy smile and hoped that the woman didn’t notice how sweaty her hands were. If Laura hadn’t been so enamored with the woman she was now leaned up against thanks to the train’s sudden sharp turn, she would have remembered that her wallet, metro card included, were sitting safely at home on top of her dresser.

\---

The next several hours of classes felt like an eternity. Laura willed the time on her watch to move faster, eager to get out of her literature humanities class so that she could head directly to the university library and do some research on the mysterious symbol she had found the previous night. Despite the tendency for books to fall off shelves when no-one was around to confirm her sanity, the library had become one of Laura’s favorite places on campus. There was something about the smell of old papers as she walked down the aisles of the archives in the basement that gave her great satisfaction, and Laura would never grow tired of looking out over the city from the peace and quiet of the top floor as she did research and homework.

When Laura arrived at her usual corner in the history section of the library, she slumped down into one of the numerous beanbags scattered around the area and pulled out her laptop and other supplies from her bag before getting to work. She leafed through her overflowing notebook and flipped to the page where she had a sketch of the symbol from the knives she found last night. Before leaving her apartment this morning, Laura had had just enough time to make a quick sketch using pencil and paper. She examined the drawing closely now, and identified what appeared to be three anchors enclosed within a circle, connected by their eyes in the very center. The formation immediately reminded Laura of Hecate’s wheel, something she had heard one of her friends talk about in passing. She began her search there, opening up several tabs to see what she could find. 

Laura was presented with an overwhelming amount of information about the ancient Greek goddess that Hecate’s wheel was named after, but very little was known about the symbol itself. She backtracked and returned to the drawing, paying more attention to the anchors this time. Thinking back on a class from earlier in the year, she recalled that anchors typically symbolized strength and stability, while objects grouped together in sets of three suggested the idea of something being all-encompassing, such as birth, life, and death, or the beginning, middle, and end. Perhaps this symbol stood for some powerful organization?

The brunette repeatedly ran into dead-ends with her research, but that didn’t stop her from writing down every bit of relevant information she could find, even pulling massive reference books off nearby shelves. The sun was beginning to set behind the city’s skyscrapers before Laura finally returned to reality and took a small break.

After getting up and looking around her, Laura realized how crazed she must look. Scribbled notes on torn-out sheets of notebook paper were scattered around the spot on the floor she had eventually moved to, and books of varying sizes filled up the remaining space. Her sweatshirt had ended up in a ball near her notes about ancient languages, and her hair had become disheveled from all the times she had lifted her glasses into her hair to periodically rub at her eyes before returning them to their place on her nose. Despite the chaos, Laura was in her element. Sitting amidst a storm of knowledge always brought her a sense of peace and calm, something that she struggled to find ever since her mother’s disappearance. It never felt right to be doing anything other than searching for the truth.

 

* * *

Each time Mircalla left Mother’s compound, she did her best to leave that aspect of her life behind. When she roamed the city or sat in the quiet of her loft apartment, she was Carmilla Karnstein, third year philosophy student at Silas University who enjoyed reading books and looking at the stars at night. She was careful to keep her lives as Mircalla and Carmilla separate, the emotional wound from her previous mistake never quite having healed properly after all this time.

Today, the raven-haired woman was Carmilla, and she was headed to her morning lecture at the university. The smaller class size due to most other students’ desire to sleep in was extremely appealing to her, and it meant that she would have the library mostly to herself while everyone else was busy.

As Carmilla descended into the subway station closest to her apartment building, she was surprised to find that it wasn’t deserted like most other days. In addition to the handful of people already waiting at the platform, she noticed a brunette standing in the middle of the mezzanine, checking her pockets with increasing frustration. The girl eventually gave up on her search, clearly lacking some way to pay the small fee of about two dollars, and took one look at the railroad clerk before darting over the turnstiles. Carmilla chuckled as the clerk immediately noticed and called the girl out on her actions.

Unsure of what exactly had compelled her to do so, Carmilla suddenly found herself standing in front of the door to the token booth, inserting a pin into the mechanism of the handle and completely dismantling it and removing the lever from the door. With the piece of cool metal in hand and the railroad clerk effectively locked in the booth, she strolled over to the turnstiles, swiped her card, and entered the platform area.

Carmilla noticed out of the corner of her eye that the brunette had been watching her from the moment she walked away from the token booth. She played with the door lever in her hands before eventually deciding to discard it, not wanting to be holding the incriminating object for too much longer. She made a bit of a show out of throwing the piece of metal off to the side of the platform, wanting to draw out the girl’s attention for as long as possible.

It felt good to be looked at with an expression other than fear for a change.

When the train finally arrived, Carmilla watched as the girl forced her way into the car like her life depended on it. She shook her head in amusement, boarding the subway soon after.

Once the train was in motion, Carmilla gradually made her way over to the girl, an idea forming in her head as she did so. When she was within range, she tapped the brunette on the shoulder while simultaneously retrieving her subway card from her back pocket, holding it up in the space between them. The girl stumbled over a thanks and took the card without hesitation. 

Carmilla allowed herself a small smile when the girl leaned into her for support as the train jerked to the side and threw most of its passengers off balance. When the girl righted herself, Carmilla tried her best not to think about how foreign the space between them felt.

 

* * *

 

The growling of Laura’s stomach reminded her that she hadn’t eaten anything since the lunch she had packed for herself. She made her way to the vending machine room on that floor, not really paying attention to where she was going, since she had made the trip so many times before. It wasn’t until she had gone to select some trail mix on the keypad that she remembered she didn’t have any money with her. She groaned and repeatedly thudded her forehead against the glass. 

“You’re gonna have to hit it a little harder than that if you want anything to come out, you know,” came a familiar voice.

Laura looked over her shoulder to find the same woman in the leather jacket from the station earlier that day, now leaned against the door frame of the room with her arms crossed in front of her. She stood there like that for a moment before straightening up and approaching the brunette.

Laura unconsciously began to inch backwards until she was flat against the machine behind her, unaware of her actions until that point. The woman continued to close the distance between them until she was standing directly in front of Laura. With a closed fist she struck the vending machine twice, mere inches past the smaller girl’s head and their bodies even closer. She heard something thud behind her, and the stranger crouched down to reach around Laura, still frozen in place, to retrieve whatever had fallen. When she finally stood back up and turned to walk out of the room, candy bar in hand, Laura released a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.

“What’s your name?” Laura randomly blurted out, not wanting the stranger to leave just yet. The woman paused in the doorway, as if she were contemplating whether or not Laura was worth a reply.

“Carmilla. And you are?”

“Laura. Laura Hollis. You can call me Hollis, a lot of people do that. Or Laura. Laura is good,” she managed to get out.

“Well, it was nice to meet you Laura,” she responded before tossing her candy bar in Laura’s direction and leaving without another word.

It wasn't trail mix, but it would do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the rate at which I'm writing, I expect to have a new chapter up every week or so. (We'll see how well I stick to that promise lol.) As always, kudos and comments are greatly appreciated, and you can also come talk to me on tumblr (waltzstein) if you'd like!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen While You Read: "My Kind of Woman" by Mac Demarco

Whenever Carmilla couldn’t sleep, or needed to clear her head, she took her motorcycle out for a ride. There was a particular stretch of highway she liked to race down late at night when there was no-one else on the road, and tonight was no exception. The wind tore at her clothing as she flew through the darkness.

_Laura. Laura Hollis._

The girl’s words echoed in her head over and over, beating in time to the blood that was pounding in her ears. She opened the throttle further, hoping that the roar of the bike’s engine would be enough to drown out the voice. Carmilla liked to believe that if she was moving fast enough, she might be able to leave everything behind her.

_You can call me Hollis, a lot of people do that._

Carmilla felt a familiar tug in her chest. The sensation reminded her of Ell, the only girl she had ever made the mistake of falling for. There was no way she could help it at the time. The way Ell had looked at her made Carmilla feel infinite, like nothing could hold her back. Ell even seemed to understand her when no-one else could, never asking questions when the two halves of Carmilla’s life threatened to spill over onto one another. She never made Carmilla feel like it was her fault that she was forced to prioritize the life she had as Mother’s lackey.

The day that had cost Ell her life had also cost Carmilla hers. Mother pursued no further punishment at the time, knowing that the vast emptiness within Carmilla was punishment enough. Carmilla had felt irreparably broken, immediately building up walls around her that she had never needed before. The only clanmate who she spoke to outside of her contracts was Mattie, the one person who had been there for her the day she broke. Carmilla kept a small place within her walls for Mattie, and left no room for anyone else. At least, that’s what Carmilla had initially thought.

Without even realizing it, the young, provincial girl Carmilla had run into twice now had somehow formed a small crack in her defenses. The shy, grateful look at the subway, the small intake of breath as Carmilla had approached her—every thought of the girl made the crack grow ever so slightly, expanding until Carmilla could feel the emotions beginning to trickle in. The city behind her was a distant glow by the time she finally recognized what the tugging sensation in her chest was: infatuation.

Panicking at the realization, Carmilla immediately blocked out any more incoming thoughts and downshifted, forcing the engine of the bike to slow itself down before squeezing the brakes and screeching to a halt. She shut off the motorcycle and removed her helmet, resting it on the curve of the gas tank in front of her. She leaned back and looked up at the sky, wondering where all the stars had gone, and did her best not to think about anything else.

After some time, Carmilla had calmed herself down. She ran her fingers through her hair and put her helmet back on, then turned the key in the ignition to bring the engine back to life. With a twist of the throttle, she whipped the bike around and took off for the city, no longer making any effort to stop the emotions that were slowly building up inside her.

The sky was just beginning to lighten by the time she returned to her apartment, vaguely aware of the small smile that had settled across her lips.

 

* * *

 

Laura sat on her sofa, toying mindlessly at the strings of her guitar as her eyes remained unfocused on no object in particular. She had exhausted every research method she could think of, and was so tired that her chest ached. It was three in the morning.

She continued to move her fingers across the instrument, her hands automatically plucking notes here and creating chords there, not quite paying attention to what she was doing. The sound that resonated from the hollow, wooden body was a warm one, but it didn’t quite match how she felt. She heard the distant drone of an engine slowly fading as it moved further and further into the distance, taking small comfort in the fact that she wasn’t the only one that couldn’t sleep tonight. She gently set down her guitar so as not to disturb the quiet stillness around her, and walked over to the window.

Laura looked up at the sky, picking out a few familiar stars. The ones she remembered seeing every night growing up seemed to have fallen from the darkness onto the buildings below, the city now its own constellation. She stood there in the soft glow of the city lights, allowing herself to believe for just a moment that everything was normal, that everything would be okay. She took a deep breath and exhaled, imagining that her problems were slowly leaving her as she did so. She’d have time to continue her work tomorrow.

As she stood there, Laura’s thoughts drifted to the woman she had first seen at the subway, then ran into again at the library. Her face heated up at the very thought, recalling how close they had been during both their encounters. Carmilla, she had said her name was. The sound of the woman’s voice had sent chills down Laura’s spine, reducing her to an incoherent mess.

Laura said the woman’s name several times to herself, liking the way it sounded as it rolled off her tongue. Then she shook her head in amusement, reminding herself that Carmilla would never be interested in a girl like her.

Laura returned to her bed and eventually fell asleep, her last thought being the lingering hope that she’d get a chance to change that.

 

* * *

 

Carmilla sat in the furthest reaches of the school’s archives, her leather boots propped up on a table and all her attention focused on the tattered and yellowed book in her hands. The oldest of the university’s works were kept in the basement, where humidity and temperature were controlled to prevent the further deterioration of the paper. This part of the library had an extensive collection of philosophy books, from Aristotle to Sartre, as well as classic literature from ancient civilizations. Carmilla loved to come here and read whenever her apartment started to feel more like a cage. This particular floor of the library had the tendency to be avoided by other students, another bonus for Carmilla’s reclusive personality.

Carmilla had been reading for some time when she was interrupted by the loud buzzing of her phone on the table. The screen flashed Mattie’s name, so she answered right away.

“Mother wanted me to let you know that she has another assignment for you. You’re expected to attend dinner with one of her clients this evening.”

Carmilla rolled her eyes, not looking forward to sitting in an uncomfortable dress and heels for several hours just to appease Mother’s powerful friends.

“And what about you?”

“I’ve got an important flight to catch tonight. I need to get in touch with our weapons merchant in Berlin. The quality of his work hasn’t been up to his usual standards lately.”

“Mother, is that you? I’m sorry, I completely mistook you for this other woman you might know, Matska Belmonde,” Carmilla teased.

“Mother won’t be around forever, you know. There’s a reason why she made you and I high priestesses. You need to take this more seriously, sis.”

“I know, I know. No need to remind me all the time, Mattie,” Carmilla grumbled. She was fully aware of her duties to the organization. It still didn’t change the fact that dealing with the business aspect of the clan had the potential to bore her to death.

“Let me know how it goes, will you? Mother rarely sends me to fancy dinners anymore.”

“Sure, I’ll let you know how long I last before I feel the need to throw one of Mother’s precious clients out the nearest window,” Carmilla scoffed before ending the call. She gathered her books and returned them to their proper shelves, something the useless students at this school always failed to do. She slipped into her leather jacket and made her way over to the stairwell and back to Mother’s compound.

\---

A few hours later, Carmilla stood outside of an excessively expensive restaurant on one of the busiest streets in Silas. She checked the time on her phone, irritated that Mother’s clients were late once again. Money made people think they were entitled to everything, including other people’s time.

She eventually spotted the sleek limousine making its way down the street towards where she was waiting on the sidewalk. As it neared, the rear window rolled down, and the sound of a wolf whistle pierced the air.

“Looking fine as always, Mircalla.” The voice belonged to Theo Straka, CEO of Corvae, and one of Mother’s most valuable business partners. Carmilla clenched her jaw to keep herself from knocking the man out as he rose from the vehicle.

“Always a pleasure to see you, Mr. Straka,” she replied as cordially as was possible through gritted teeth.

“Please, call me Theo. I will never understand why you insist on being so rigidly formal.”

“We are here for business, nothing more,” the woman retorted. She turned on her heel and entered the restaurant, not bothering to make sure Theo and his assistants were able to keep up.

The receptionist immediately recognized Carmilla, and directed her and the rest of the party to a large booth. Their location in the corner of the room afforded them more privacy than an ordinary table in the middle of the dining area. “Your waitress will be with you shortly,” the woman said before setting down the menus and walking away. Carmilla took a moment to survey the dimly lit room around her.

“You act as if you’re the one that has an all-powerful assassin organization hunting them down,” Theo ridiculed.

“You can never be too cautious.”

“I’ll bet you’d be a lot of fun if you had a drink or two and just relaxed for once.”

“I’m not here for your enjoyment, _Mr. Straka_.”

Theo put his hands up in silent resignation. Carmilla opened her menu to distract herself from her desire to eviscerate the next person that opened their mouth, and was relieved when the waitress finally arrived.

“Hi, I’m Laura, and I’ll be your waitress tonight. Can I get you guys something to drink?”

A wave of emotions immediately crashed into her, but Carmilla did her best to ignore them. She looked up and saw that the girl was looking at her expectantly, clearly recognizing the woman sitting in front of her but doing her best to remain professional.

“I’ll just have sparkling water,” Carmilla responded, her voice shifting from the biting tone it had been mere moments ago to a contradicting mixture of disinterest and smokiness. Theo noticed the sudden adjustment and raised his eyebrow as he watched the exchange.

“I’d like to order your most expensive bottle of wine,” Theo declared, never turning down an opportunity to flaunt his wealth. “And Laura is a _beautiful_ name, by the way,” he added with a wink.

“Oh, um, thank you sir,” Laura replied, glancing quickly in Carmilla’s direction before taking the remaining orders and hurrying off.

“Care to explain what happened the ice queen I walked in here with?” Theo inquired.

“You wanted me to relax, didn’t you?”

Theo merely shrugged and changed topics.

“It appears that we are here for business, so let’s talk business, shall we? As you are well aware, Corvae is one of the most affluent corporations in the world. However, with Silas as our headquarters, we face many aggressions from other competing businesses that also operate within the city.”

He took a dramatic pause, and Carmilla waited for him to proceed.

“We recently made a business deal with a rival corporation, Lawrence Incorporated. Actually, we blackmailed them into accepting our deal, but that detail is inconsequential. Regardless, one of the terms of our agreement was that they would pay us a reasonably over-priced monthly sum in exchange for our corporate security services, including but not limited to information security and crime detection.”

Theo had to stop talking momentarily, as Laura had returned with the drinks. As she set the glasses down, Theo flashed his typical charismatic smile, but the brunette never noticed it, instead pulling out her notepad and pen.

“Are we ready to order?” Laura asked, addressing the entire table but only focusing on the dark-haired woman.

“I’ll have the seafood risotto,” Carmilla smirked, noticing that Theo’s pride had taken a blow when he was unable to gain the waitress’s attention.

“And I would like the lobster frittata,” Theo announced, easily picking the most expensive item on the menu.

“Uh, Mr. Straka sir, are you sure that—”

“Yes I’m sure I want the lobster frittata,” Theo interrupted, preventing his assistant from saying anything else. The skittish man gulped and remained silent for the remainder of the evening.

After everyone had finished ordering entrees that were within a more reasonable price range, Laura tucked her notepad in her vest pocket. “Your food will be ready shortly,” she assured the group before quickly departing to place the order.

“As I was saying before I was so inconveniently distracted by our lovely waitress,” Theo began, “Lawrence Inc. signed a contract saying that they would pay a monthly fee of $50,000 for Corvae’s services. We had no problems for the first two months, but when the third payment was due, I was told by a Lawrence Inc. representative that they did not have the money in time, but would pay double next month.”  
  
“And this is a problem because?”

“Well, you see, if Lawrence Inc. doesn’t pay for this month’s services, how can we be certain that they will pay us at all in the future?”

“I still don’t see how this requires Nosferatu’s interference.”

“I’m disappointed Mircalla, I thought you would have figured it out by now,” Theo gloated. “We would like you to retrieve our payment from Lawrence Inc., through any means necessary.”

“And how much are you willing to pay?”

“$100,000 for your services, more if you don’t kill anyone. We don’t want anyone finding out that Corvae had to blackmail their rivals _twice_ , do we?”

“Consider it done.” Carmilla reached into her wallet and pulled out a small business card, blank save for the clan insignia, which served as an official contract between Mother’s organization and her clients. Carmilla was given a pen by one of Theo’s assistants, and after signing the back of the card, she handed it to the man seated across from her.

“Wonderful,” he smiled.

 

* * *

 

Laura was leaning against the counter of the kitchen service area where food was waiting to be retrieved, watching the dark-haired woman as she stood from her table and crossed the dining area. Carmilla looked intimidating and powerful, and seemed to command the attention of the entire room as she passed by the other guests.

The dress she was wearing was a surprising deviation from the woman’s more casual look of a leather jacket and boots. The simple black dress displayed the curves of Carmilla’s body, and the definition of her arms was apparent even through the long-sleeved, skin-tight fabric. Two symmetrical cutouts on the sides of the dress revealed the skin of her toned abdomen. The outfit, combined with the woman’s dramatic makeup and hair secured in a high ponytail, was too much for Laura not to stare. She was roused from her stupor when one of the chefs had to ring the bell multiple times to get her attention.

Laura mumbled some excuse about needing to use a restroom and hurried after the woman. As she neared the table where Carmilla’s group was seated, the man that had been mildly flirting with her each time she came to take their order winked at her, not even missing a beat of the conversation he was having on his phone. As Laura passed the table she caught a snippet of the conversation the man was having.

“...decided on, yes. Mircalla made the arrangements. Have a payment prepared for Nosferatu before...”

The girl caught a glimpse of the card that the man was toying with in his hands, a silver logo embossed on the black paper: it was the symbol that she had spent days and nights researching, the one that she had found on the knives. She had to be sure, so she doubled back and made an excuse out of refilling the table’s water glasses. Laura didn’t recognize the names that had been mentioned, but she had been right about the card. She kept her expression as calm and polite as she could, focusing on not spilling water on the guests as both her mind and her pulse raced.

Laura mentally threw up in her mouth when the man thanked her with a “Thanks gorgeous,” and quickly sped away as soon as she was finished with her task. Since there was nothing she could do about her discovery until her shift ended, Laura did her best not to think about it in the meantime. She hoped that Carmilla was still in the restroom, if that was even where the woman had disappeared off to. After walking down a short corridor, she pushed open the door to the women’s restroom. Her heart shot up to her throat when she saw the familiar figure in black reapplying dark lipstick in the mirror. Carmilla’s eyes moved from what they were focused on to meet Laura’s own.

Carmilla capped the small container of makeup when she finished before turning around and leaning against the bathroom counter, her arms crossed in front of her.

“Oh, hey, I was just on my way to wash my hands. Got some gunk on them after picking up some plates, you know how it goes,” Laura rambled, trying to not make it seem like she had intentionally followed the woman.

Carmilla merely grinned and stepped aside, the look on her face letting Laura know that she didn’t believe her story one bit.

“Also I really like your dress, you look great in it you know,” Laura let slip. Her face flushed a bright shade of pink when her brain registered what she had just done.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” the woman replied, smirking.

“Oh, this? Everyone has to wear this, my boss pays for it. I wouldn’t even be able to afford the bow tie on my own,” Laura laughed nervously.

Carmilla observed the girl as she washed her hands. Laura felt extremely self-conscious as she tried to pull paper towels out of the dispenser but failed several times. When she turned back around, the woman had moved closer. Laura stood perfectly still, unsure what she was supposed to do as Carmilla reached up and adjusted the girl’s bow-tie.

With her hands still on Laura’s shoulders, she said, “How about I take you out for coffee tomorrow?”

“Me? Tomorrow?”  
  
“You’re the only one in here with me, Laura.”   
  
“That’s right, you’re right! I totally didn’t notice.” (Laura _had_ noticed.) “Coffee, yes! Coffee sounds good! I’d love to get coffee with you.”

“Great. I’ll see you tomorrow at 4, at the cafe down the street from the library,” Carmilla said, already on her way out of the restroom.

Laura didn’t move from her spot by the sinks until the door had slowly closed itself again. She went to adjust her bow-tie, a sort of nervous tick she had developed, when her thumb came in contact with a slip of paper that had somehow gotten stuck behind the fabric. She unfolded it and found a series of numbers written in black ink, with _Carmilla_ signed below.

Laura did a small victory dance before putting the paper safely in her pocket and returning to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late post! This chapter is a bit longer to make up for it. Thank you to anyone that is still reading my fanfic!


	4. Chapter 4

_Listen While You Read_ _: “Florida Kilos” by Lana Del Rey_

\---

The smell of freshly ground coffee blended together with the sounds of light chatter and espresso machines in the small hole-in-the-wall cafe. Carmilla sat at a narrow counter by the window, watching as the people outside hurried by. The sky was overcast, and raindrops were just beginning to dot the sidewalks far below.

Carmilla had walked into the mostly empty coffee shop half an hour earlier than Laura was expected to arrive, so she went ahead and ordered herself a latte while she waited. Her fingers absentmindedly traced the ridges of the cup’s paper sleeve, the hot liquid inside gradually warming her hands. Carmilla heard the sound of scraping chairs as a group of students packed up their textbooks and left her alone in the cafe with a jingle of the door’s bell.

“What’s up fang-face?” came a voice from behind her. Carmilla shifted around on her stool to face the tall redhead that had addressed her. Danny Lawrence was part-time barista here at the cafe and full-time athlete at Silas University, and had started using the nickname to refer to the contrast between Carmilla’s dark hair and pale skin. The two didn’t quite hit it off at first, but after discovering how effortless it was to talk to one another, they eventually became close friends.

“Hey Xena.”

“Haven’t seen you here in a while, how’ve you been?”

“Busy.”

“You know, if you’re ever _not_ busy, you should consider handing in a résumé. You make a better espresso than any person I’ve ever met.”

“Thanks Danny, I’ll think about it.” Carmilla smiled to herself and took a sip of her coffee. “How’s the family? Still not working for your dad I see.”  
  
“Yeah, well, I’d feel weird if I took his offer. It would look like I was getting handouts for being the daughter of the company’s president. And besides, I don’t want to be just another Lawrence working in airplane manufacturing, I want to do my own thing.”  
  
“I get that. You don’t want to be in his shadow your entire life.”  
  
“Exactly.”

Neither of them said anything after that, an easy silence eventually settling into place. Carmilla enjoyed the small talks she and Danny would have whenever she stopped by for coffee. With Mattie, it was always something about the clan or another business partner, so it was nice to just be Carmilla Karnstein, and not Mircalla—if only for a little while.

Carmilla looked up expectantly when the door to the cafe opened once more, and was slightly disappointed to see that it was only a medium-sized crowd of students who had recently gotten out of their last lecture for the day. The time on Carmilla’s phone indicated that Laura would arrive any minute now. She went back to sipping her drink, tracing the cup’s paper sleeve, and watching all the faces outside blend together into a grey cloud of their own.

Ten minutes had passed, and Laura was nowhere to be seen. Carmilla was beginning to think that maybe she had scared the girl off with her advances, and that Laura wasn’t really interested in meeting up. The small gasps could have been out of discomfort, and her shy words really just a politeness that, now that Carmilla thought about it, she could see the girl treating any stranger with.

“Small hot cocoa for L!”

Without meaning to Carmilla immediately stiffened at the name, her grip on her coffee tightening and threatening to crush the cup beneath her fingers. She took deep, slow breaths, reminding herself that Ell was a fairly common name, that this wasn’t the first time she’d run into a girl with the same name but a different story to tell.

The raven-haired woman saw movement out of the corner of her eye as a coffee cup was placed on the counter to her left. Carmilla turned to look at who had decided to occupy the seat immediately next to her when there were four other empty stools, and was surprised to see Laura standing where a stranger should have been.

“Mind if I sit here?”

“Not at all.”

Laura let the strap of her messenger bag slide off her shoulder as she lifted it up onto the counter and settled down next to Carmilla. She was seated on the edge of the stool, as if she didn’t want to get too close to the woman on her right. Carmilla noticed the girl’s attempt to hide her shyness and chuckled quietly to herself.

“I don’t bite, you know.”

“Oh, I know, I just—”

“Unless, of course, you’re into that sort of thing,” Carmilla added with a small smirk. Laura bunched up her nose and blushed profusely, but laughter was still dangerously close to leaking from the corners of the girl’s eyes and mouth. Carmilla could also see that the brunette’s hands were shaking ever so slightly as her thumbs traced the shape of the cup’s plastic lid.

“So, Carmilla, right?” the girl began.

“That would be me.”

“Do you, uh, come here often?”

“When I have the time.”

“That’s cool. Busy with work or something?”  
  
“Something like that.” There was a beat of silence as the brunette thought of what to say next.

“You must make a lot if you can afford to go out on dates to fancy restaurants,” Laura said with just the trace of a frown. Carmilla nearly choked on the coffee she had been drinking, but quickly covered it up by clearing her throat.

“Date? No, last night was for my job. And my door doesn’t swing that way.” An unidentifiable look—relief? surprise?—passed through Laura’s eyes, but vanished as suddenly as it had appeared.

“Tell me about yourself, Laura.”

“Well, there’s not much to tell. I moved to Silas six months ago to attend the university here, and because my dad thinks I’m just taking a gap year, I have to pay for tuition on my own. I work as a waitress at the restaurant you were at last night, usually the evening shift, and I make just enough from tips to pay back my loans and afford rent each month.”

“Why’d you come to Silas, of all places?” Carmilla asked, doing her best not to sound too surprised. She had assumed that Laura lived here, since no-one in their right mind ever moved to the city.

“It’s, uh, it’s kind of complicated. It’s hard to explain.” Carmilla nodded silently in acceptance and finished the last of her coffee.

“So, are you from around here?” Laura inquired.

“Not exactly. I’ve lived here for many years, but I grew up elsewhere.”

“Did your family move to Silas?”  
  
“No. I left my family and came here on my own.”

Carmilla had been watching two workers unload a delivery truck across the street. She turned to look at the girl sitting beside her, and saw that Laura had been studying her intently. They held each other’s gaze for a moment, an understanding passing between them.

“There’s just something about the city,” they said simultaneously. Laura laughed, leaning into the woman seated beside her while Carmilla grinned, butterflies erupting in the woman’s stomach. Laura’s face reddened when she realized the contact she had initiated, and immediately sat up straight.

“S-sorry, I wasn’t really thinking,” she stammered.

“It’s fine, really,” Carmilla replied. Laura smiled nervously and rubbed the back of her neck.

The two sat there for a few hours, talking about anything that came to mind. Laura learned about Carmilla’s love for art and literature, and Carmilla in turn listened as Laura explained what exactly it was about journalism that fascinated her so much. Laura’s shyness disappeared as she unknowingly inched closer and closer to Carmilla, and Carmilla forgot all about her efforts to keep herself guarded against her growing attachment to the girl beside her.

“Can I ask you something, Carmilla?” Laura asked after a while.  
  
“Of course, what’s up?”

Laura fidgeted where she sat as the dark-haired woman waited patiently. “So, I’ve been wondering. Are you, by any chance, s—”

Laura was cut off by the sound of Carmilla’s phone ringing in her jacket. The woman cursed herself for not putting it on silent. When she checked her phone, and saw that it was Mattie calling.  
  
“Sorry, I have to take this, it’ll just take a minute.” Carmilla stood from her seat and walked off towards the short hallway where the restrooms were before answering the call.  
  
“Mattie?”  
  
“It’s urgent. Mother wants you at the compound immediately.”  
  
“What for?”  
  
“Corvae had a security breach in their databases. Someone broke in late last night. Theo believes that they might try and blackmail him for the information, or sell it off to someone else.”  
  
Carmilla sighed loudly before answering. “Alright. I’ll be there in ten.”

After hanging up, the woman strolled back over to where Laura was waiting for her. The brunette turned to face her when she heard footsteps approaching, and her smile immediately vanished when she saw that Carmilla’s expression had darkened.

“Sorry Laura, I have to go. Something came up at work.”  
  
“Oh. That’s okay. Work is important, right?” Laura’s voice sounded small. “Will I see you again?”

Carmilla froze in place and gripped the counter for support. Those had been Ell’s last words. She thought carefully before finally responding.

“Call me sometime.”

 

* * *

 

 _Listen While You Read_ _: “Off To The Races” by Lana Del Rey_

\---

Laura paced back and forth in the middle of her studio apartment. Notes and library books were strewn everywhere, and her half-eaten dinner of instant ramen sat next to her laptop on the small wooden table. After her initial euphoria from spending time with Carmilla had worn off, a thought that had been lingering in the back of the girl’s mind finally surfaced, and she acted on the idea immediately. She was unable to go even one day without doing what she could to take advantage of any leads that might explain what had happened to her mother.

Carmilla had said that her dinner last night was for business. Thinking back on the conversation Laura overheard the man at the table having, this meant that Carmilla was somehow connected to the people or companies known as Nosferatu and Mircalla. Despite new information regarding the symbol, Laura still hadn’t been able to find anything helpful. Neither Nosferatu nor Mircalla existed, as far as the internet and library were concerned. The latter of the two was frustratingly familiar to Laura for some inexplicable reason, as if her eyes had skimmed across the word in a book somewhere.

Laura was almost tempted to text Carmilla and ask her if she knew anything about the organizations, but she didn’t want it to look like she had been intentionally eavesdropping when Laura had only heard the conversation in passing. And besides, wasn’t she supposed to wait at least a day before talking to someone after a date? _No, not a date_ , the girl reminded herself. She and Carmilla were just acquaintances, friends at best. Either way, Laura could never be sure how others felt about her. She was terrible at reading another person’s emotions, and sometimes wished that everyone had a neon sign above their head that made it clear whether or not they liked her.

With a fresh mug of steaming hot cocoa in her hands, Laura sat back down at the small kitchen table to continue her research. A low battery warning popped up, and the girl scrambled to find her charger and plug her laptop in. After tying her hair up and tucking one leg beneath her on the chair, Laura opened a new tab in her web browser. There had to be _something_ about Nosferatu or Mircalla out there; there was no way an organization could exist without there being some record of it.

Last time Laura had put her investigative journalism skills to use, she nearly ended up dead in an alleyway. The girl had since learned her lesson, limiting her search to information she could find on her own without having to talk to strangers. There was, however, one lead she might be able to take advantage of without putting her life in danger again. The brunette put on a sweatshirt over her Dr. Who tank top and changed into a pair of jeans before grabbing her phone and exiting her apartment. With the door locked and the makeshift toothpick alarm in place, Laura made her way down the stairwell and onto the street, moving in the direction of the restaurant where she worked.

Her plan was to ask the hostess if she could take a quick look at the previous night’s reservation list, or maybe ask one of the other waiters if they knew anything about the man she had served last night. Someone had to have recognized him when he came in with Carmilla—it was impossible to miss the arrogance that filled any space the man occupied.

Laura was about four blocks away from the restaurant when she heard a loud, almost metallic slam come from somewhere down the alleyway she had just passed. She wanted to ignore it and continue on her way, but curiosity got the best of her. After a moment’s hesitation Laura turned around and cautiously moved towards the source of the sound.

As the girl went further and further down the alley, she could gradually hear the sound of two voices. It took a moment for her eyes to fully adjust to the darkness after walking along the brightly lit boulevard, and when they finally did she noticed two figures standing beside a black van. Laura quickly found a hiding place between the brick wall of a building and a delivery truck that was much closer to the strangers. She was now able to see that one of the figures was actually forced up against the van, their arm twisted behind their back at a painful angle by a much smaller person. Laura was also close enough to hear what it was the two were arguing about.

“Where is it?” a female voice growled. Laura guessed that it was the smaller figure speaking. She wanted to get a closer look to try and identify the woman in case she needed to call the police, but the stranger’s face was obscured by a black hood that matched the rest of her tactical outfit. If the moon hadn’t been out, the woman’s black clothing would have made her practically invisible. And more importantly, Laura wouldn’t have been able to see the faint outline of a logo engraved near the hilt of the knives strapped to the woman’s thighs. She had seen it once, and now it was showing up everywhere: the anchor symbol was the same as the one from the other knives, as well as the wealthy man’s business card. Laura bit her tongue in an attempt to remain silent.

“I- I don’t have it,” the man stuttered, his voice slightly muffled from being forced against the vehicle in front of him.

There was no response from the woman. Laura waited for something to happen, and suddenly the man cried out in pain. He had foolishly tried to muscle out of his attacker’s grip, and in response the woman had twisted his arm further, mere degrees away from dislocating one of his joints.

“Okay! Okay! I’ll tell you anything! Just let me go! Please!” the man conceded. The woman released some of the pressure on his arm, but not enough so that he could break out of her hold.

“You were saying?”

“They’re hiding out in the abandoned warehouse by the docks, the guys that broke into Corvae,” the man grunted, still in relative pain from the position of his arm.

“And why aren’t they here?” the woman asked in a dangerously calm voice.

“They didn’t take the bait, they thought there was something fishy about the deal.”

“I can never trust you incompetent fools to get anything done.”

Laura’s leg was starting to cramp up from the awkward position she was crouched in between the truck and the brick wall behind her. She watched as the woman changed tactics and twisted the man’s wrist so that his palm was now facing his back, the position putting tremendous strain on his entire arm.

“I- I won’t let it happen again!” the man cried out louder than before, his voice cracking from excruciating pain.

“It better not,” the woman warned, releasing the man’s arm and throwing him to the ground. “Meet me here with the flash drive in a week, or I will personally hunt you down and kill you.” The man nodded quickly and scrambled into the van, starting the engine before tearing down the alleyway in a squeal of tires.

The woman watched him leave before turning and walking down the alleyway opposite the man’s hasty exit, and towards where Laura was hiding. As she drew nearer, the girl made an attempt to move further behind the vehicle to stay out of view, but failed miserably as she stepped on a discarded plastic bag. _This is it. This is how it ends,_ she thought. The woman turned to face the noise, and Laura could have sworn that the hooded figure was looking right at the girl. Laura held her breath and didn’t dare move. After what seemed like an eternity, the woman casually turned away and continued walking.

Laura had no idea where the stranger was headed, but she decided to follow the woman anyways. She had no plan for what she intended to do if she ever caught up to the figure dressed in black, so instead Laura focused on keeping track of every twist and turn they took so that she wouldn’t get lost.

Recalling that she still wanted to live to see the light of day, Laura kept a safe distance between her and the woman walking at a steady pace ahead of her. She had no clue what she expected to get from tailing the stranger. After seeing the symbol on the woman’s knives, Laura’s head was immediately filled with questions. Was this the woman that had left the warning? Did she work for Nosferatu or Mircalla? Who was Corvae? How did Carmilla tie into all of this, if at all? And did any of this have to do with her mother’s disappearance?

Up ahead, the woman had stopped walking, so Laura did the same. The girl’s initial confusion was replaced with panic when she realized that the hooded figure was now facing her, knives drawn in each hand. Laura barely had time to react before the first blade was hurled at her.

Laura dove out of the way, narrowly dodging the deadly weapon. She half-tripped half-rolled and came to an awkward crouch, off balanced and barely ready for the next attack. She hadn’t been to any kind of martial arts practice since she left her hometown, and her mind was scrambling to remember anything that might help her. As she hastily dusted the gravel from her jeans, she looked to her left and saw a piece of discarded pipe lying on the ground within arm’s reach and picked it up with both hands. When the next knife was thrown at her, Laura quickly stood up and swatted at the projectile, the knife ricocheting off the pipe and barely avoiding her face. Laura was not expecting the force at which the blade had collided with the metal in her hands, and she nearly lost her grip on the pipe.

The woman had two new knives drawn in each hand and was now fast approaching. She spun the blades around so that the grip changed from one for throwing to one more suitable in hand-to-hand combat, the glinting pieces of metal now pointing towards the ground as the woman brought her hands up to her face in fists. Laura swallowed hard and shifted into a defensive stance, her left foot slightly in front of the other and the pipe extended outwards in the fashion of a sword.

The stranger’s first move wasn’t an offensive one. She directed a fake jab at Laura’s head, causing the less experienced fighter to flinch and take several steps back and stumble as she did so. Laura heard her attacker chuckle at her clumsiness, but was too focused on not getting sliced to pieces to really care. When Laura saw the woman shift her weight forward onto the balls of her feet, she knew that her adversary wouldn’t be playing around any longer.

This time the attack was directed at Laura’s abdomen, but she was quick to block the incoming knives. The force of the deflection was strong enough to send searing pain shooting through her left arm, which still hadn’t fully recovered from being violently thrown to the ground earlier that week. The woman slashed through the air again, and Laura jerked her head back far enough to avoid getting her face cut open. Using Laura’s lack of balance to her advantage, the attacker aimed a high kick at Laura’s head. The girl was unprepared and had barely ducked under the attack when the woman quickly spun around in the opposite direction, connecting her elbow with Laura’s jaw and sending the brunette stumbling to the side. Laura’s vision blurred as her entire head began throbbing, and she gingerly touched her rapidly-swelling face to assess the damage.

To Laura’s surprise, the woman waited until Laura had regained her balance before charging at the girl again. She was a whirlwind of fists and knees and elbows, and Laura was barely able to keep up. None of the attacks managed to fully connect with the brunette’s body, but the exertion was beginning to take a toll on her muscles, and she could feel her movements slowing down as her lungs screamed at her to rest. The woman could see the girl beginning to tire landed her next kick squarely on Laura’s chest, forcefully knocking her to the ground. Before the girl could get up, Laura felt the pressure of a knee forcing down on her sternum. Bits of gravel dug into her back through her sweatshirt, and the combined pain from the kick and the woman’s body weight made it difficult to breathe.

The assailant made the mistake of doing nothing to restrain Laura’s lower body, so the girl used that to her advantage, bringing her knees up as quickly as possible to collide with the back of the attacker’s head. The woman’s weight was thrown forward and off of Laura’s body, but she seemed completely unfazed. As the stranger gracefully rolled off of her, Laura scrambled to the side, the asphalt scraping at her palms, and prepared herself for another attack.

By the time Laura had spun back around, the woman was already standing. Somehow, her black hood had not come off despite the brawl that had ensued. Laura made a mental note to ask the woman where she bought her clothes, but was soon brought back to reality when she remembered the danger she was in. As she readied herself for another attack, Laura was taken by surprise when the hooded woman suddenly turned and took off running down the alleyway. Laura threw the pipe off to the side, the metal ringing out as it hit the ground, and chased after her attacker.

Her body was aching all over from the beating she had taken, but Laura tried focused on closing the distance between her and the woman. Not long into the chase, the two reached a dead end and the hooded figure came to a stop. Behind her Laura was hunched over with her hands on her knees, trying to keep an eye on her attacker but also trying not to pass out from oxygen deprivation and pain. The woman took one look over her shoulder before facing the end of the alley once more. She backed up a few paces, bouncing on the balls of her feet, then sprinted at the wall. Laura watched in amazement as the stranger pushed off the ground, running up the wall in a few quick steps before grabbing onto the fire escape above her. As the woman pulled herself up, it occurred to Laura that she was physically incapable of replicating what she had just witnessed. She watched as the stranger quickly reached the roof of the building, then turned around to face the girl one last time before taking off into the night.

Laura’s heart stopped at the woman’s next words.

“Not half bad, Hollis.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for another late chapter, this one was a bit harder to get into writing. Feedback and comments are welcome as always!


	5. Chapter 5

_Listen While You Read: "Before I Ever Met You" by BANKS_

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Carmilla and Mattie stood facing each other on a sparring mat in the training room of the Nosferatu compound. The two women each held long wooden staffs in their tape-wrapped hands and began circling around the grey mat, waiting for the other to make a move. Carmilla’s tank-top clung to her back with sweat, but she was too focused on her opponent to notice any discomfort. Mattie moved in for an attack, swiping at Carmilla’s legs in an attempt to knock her to the ground. Carmilla twisted the back half of her staff up from her side to strike the weapon out of the way. Using the momentum of the movement, she transitioned backwards into a corkscrew flip, landing just out of range of Mattie’s follow-up attack. The older woman lunged forward in a kick, using her staff to push off the ground and vault herself through the air to close the space between her and Carmilla. The younger fighter rolled beneath the attack and spun back around to face Mattie, who was now standing with her staff passively by her side and a hand on her hip.

“I remember when Mother first brought you in. You were just as feisty as you are now,” Mattie said, grinning.

“I’d like to think that my feistiness is more refined, aged even, like a nice glass of wine,” the younger woman jested, holding her hand out to collect Mattie’s wooden staff before also returning her own to the designated stand.

“Mmm, yes. Remind me to bring you along next time I get a chance to go to Rome. I’ll show you what good wine is.”

“I’d love to see Rome, but I’m only going so long as you promise you won’t try to set me up with another one of your ‘friends’ again.”

“Oh, come on. I know that what happened to Ell really hurt you, but you need to try and move on.”

“I appreciate your concern, Mattie, but I’m fine on my own. I don’t need anyone else in my life right now.”

“Mircalla, you haven’t been the same person for three years now. You shut almost everyone out, and no-one ever knows where you disappear off to, not even Mother. Don’t you get lonely?”

“I don’t see what that has to do with anything.”

“I just want you to be happy, sis.”

“That’s great Mattie, but I can’t be happy if I’m constantly afraid that Mother will use my happiness as leverage against me!” Carmilla snapped, her patience having finally reached its limit. An awkward silence hung between the two. Mattie stood unmoving with her hands clasped in front of her while Carmilla crouched on the floor, forcefully cramming her equipment into a bag.

“I’m sorry,” the younger woman said eventually after stopping her movements.

“It’s alright. I won’t hold your fears against you.”

Carmilla finished packing and stood back up to face Mattie. “I know I’m not very good at showing it, but I’m grateful that you’ve always been there for me.”

“I know,” Mattie replied, smiling softly. After a moment, the older woman walked away, leaving Carmilla all alone in the vast training room.

Carmilla did a once-over of the chamber to ensure that all the equipment was back where it belonged, then threw her duffle bag over her shoulder and headed for the exit. As she walked past human-shaped targets with various red dots spaced on different vital points of each figure, she noticed that the targets had recently been replaced and had yet to be riddled with holes from various projectiles. This gave Carmilla an idea. The dark-haired woman set her equipment bag down on a bench off to the side of the practice area and walked over to the metal locker of throwing knives. After scanning her thumb print, a mechanical clicking noise indicated that the locks on the titanium doors had been disengaged. She selected a handful of various throwing knives, then closed the locker and headed back to the target range.

The woman gripped one knife by its blade in her right hand while the remaining four knives were held in the other at her side. She took a step forward with her opposite foot and extended her arm in a throwing motion, flicking her wrist just before the release of the blade. The projectile rotated end over end as it flew through the air before finally embedding itself deep into the middle of a red dot on the target’s head. The remaining knives soon followed, all but one blade hitting its intended mark due to being thrown by Carmilla’s non-dominant hand.

If there was one person that never missed her mark, it was Mattie. No matter which hand she threw with, or what it was she was throwing, she could be guaranteed to hit anything with pinpoint accuracy. Carmilla wasn’t going to beat herself up for coming in second to Mattie, because out of the entire clan, they were the only two that had the skill for throwing knives. Most of the older members were no longer doing any fieldwork and were out of practice, and the recruits always preferred the concealable handguns and other new gadgets. Carmilla and Mattie, on the other hand, knew that targets never expected them to actually _throw_ the knives they used in hand-to-hand combat, so it gave them a distinct advantage when they were completing contracts.

Carmilla’s mind began to wander as she removed the blades from the target by their matching black hilts and repositioned herself in at the end of the range. It had been over two weeks since she had confronted a thug on the whereabouts of Corvae’s stolen information and had also encountered the brunette. She had to give Laura some credit: she hadn’t noticed that anyone was following her when she went to meet up with the man, and if the girl hadn’t been unfortunate enough to compromise her hiding place, Carmilla would have remained oblivious. And Laura’s fighting abilities… the older woman was surprised, to say the least. It was always refreshing to meet a girl that could hold her own. But as impressed as she was, Carmilla couldn’t help but wonder if she had made a mistake in revealing herself. The decision had come as an impulse, driven by that fundamental need to acknowledge the skill in another person. It was also more than that, but Carmilla stopped herself before she could continue the thought, refocusing her attention on her training.

After a few more rounds of target practice, Carmilla locked the knives back up in their titanium locker and left the training room. She took a relatively unused passage to avoid running into anyone, and headed back to her room to quickly change her clothes and retrieve her motorcycle helmet. Even though she no longer lived in the compound, every recruit was given a room, and deep down she would always be grateful for being taken in from the streets. She didn’t want to stay here any longer than necessary, however, so she changed into kevlar-lined jeans, a new t-shirt, and threw on her protective leather jacket. She listened for any noises outside her door, then walked briskly out of her room and down the hallway, her motorcycle helmet in hand and equipment bag slung over her shoulder. Carmilla only passed one other person on her way to the underground parking garage, but the recruit didn’t attempt to engage in conversation after recognizing the older assassin.

When Carmilla walked into the concrete parking garage, she saw her black sportbike waiting in its usual place in between two concrete pillars. She slid her helmet on, and after swinging her leg over the motorcycle and bringing the engine to life, she pressed a button on the remote hanging from her keychain to open a false wall at the top of an upward-sloping ramp on the other end of the parking garage. She let the bike warm itself up before revving the engine and speeding towards the exit, the sound of the bike echoing loudly throughout the vast chamber and both wheels lifting off the ground momentarily as Carmilla hit the ramp without a second thought about how fast she was moving.

After a glance back to ensure that the false door had closed back up, Carmilla pinned down the throttle and leaned low over the gas tank, minimizing drag as best she could. She shifted her weight around in the seat of the bike and leaned into every twist of the road, only minimally reducing her speed to avoid losing control of the motorcycle at sharper turns. Carmilla had traveled this road hundreds of times, and by now knew every mile of it by heart. She passed by the corner where a bolt of lightning had cracked a large oak tree right in two in the middle of the night, leaving a blackened skeleton for her to discover in the morning. Next came the boulder she had nearly crashed into when she first got her bike and was still an over-confident teenager. And finally, as the tree line receded and the path she was riding along connected with the main road that led back to the city, she opened up her throttle once more and rocketed down the pavement like blood rushing back into a heart.

Carmilla felt most free when she was all alone on her motorcycle, with nothing to worry about but the vast expanse of road ahead of her. It didn’t matter where Carmilla was headed to, because all she needed to focus on was where she was right now. Riding her motorcycle was the only time she didn’t need to be concerned about who she was meeting and who she’d have to pretend to be next. Carmilla had been searching for who she was ever since she had been taken in, and had found it only on the back of a bike, moving so fast that the world was reduced to a multicolored blur around her.

As the woman neared the city, the number of cars began to pick up, so she reduced her speed. She slipped between cars to move ahead of the building traffic, and took the familiar route back to her apartment building. She had been so focused on dodging bad drivers that she hadn’t noticed the police officer sitting in the driveway of a parking garage, and when she sped by going twice the posted speed limit, the car immediately pulled out behind her, lights flashing red and blue as the officer ordered her over speakers to pull over to the side. Not wanting to evade the officer and potentially make matters worse, Carmilla slowed her bike down and parked her bike on the side of the street. She took her helmet off and waited impatiently for the man to approach her and write a ticket or two.

“Ma’am, are you aware of how fast you were going?”

“Yep.”

“And are you aware of the speed limit signs posted at regular intervals throughout the city?"

“I always thought they were more of a suggestion,” Carmilla shrugged unapologetically. She looked over at the officer to see what his reaction was. He was younger than most, no more than a few months out of the police academy. The officer looked genuinely confused, as if he believed that Carmilla meant what she said.

“Uh, well, they’re not, ma’am.” The officer seemed extremely nervous, not quite sure what to do next. He wouldn’t look Carmilla in the eyes (she had smelled new blood and opted for the death stare), so he settled instead on surveying the woman’s motorcycle.

“My eyes are up here, Officer Beefcake.”

“That’s not— it’s Officer Kirsch to you.” The man’s face was flushed red.

“Alright, _Officer_ _Kirsch_ , are you going to write me a ticket or what?”

“Well, I, uh, I think I’m supposed to write you up. But like, I really like your bike, so I’m going to let you off with just a warning. And no more speeding, okay? Someone could get hurt.”

Carmilla quirked up an eyebrow in surprise. “Sure thing, Beefcake.”

The woman went to slip on her helmet, surprised that she had been let off so easily. As she secured the chin strap, she saw a shadow moving across the gas tank of the motorcycle. When she turned to see what had blocked out the light, she was met with Laura’s familiar figure, this time missing the smile that Carmilla had come to associate with the brunette.

 

* * *

 

_Listen While You Read: "Goddess" by BANKS_

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It had been two weeks since Laura had seen or heard from Carmilla. There was no sign of the older woman at the library, the restaurant where Laura worked, or even the cafe where they had sat and talked for hours. Laura considered calling Carmilla, but she could never bring herself to dial the woman’s number, not knowing if she was ready to hear the truth from someone she wasn’t sure she could trust.

Laura’s body had since stopped aching from the beating it had taken after pursuing Carmilla in the alleyway, but the pain had been replaced with an uneasy feeling that continued to gnaw away at her. She could feel her mind struggling to grasp at all the facts and pull them together. It almost gave her a headache thinking about how Carmilla tied into everything, why she ran around toting knives and going out on expensive dinners with wealthy businessmen. In an effort to relax and get her mind off everything, she decided to dedicate the morning to cleaning her small studio apartment.

Clothes had started piling up on the armchair by the window, so she started by hanging up sweatshirts and throwing dirty clothes in the basket in her closet. She made a mental note to ask her neighbor across the hall if they had any spare detergent they could lend her so she could run to the laundromat later. Laura started to go empty out the pockets of various pants, pulling the fabric inside-out, when a small slip of paper fell out and fell to the floor. She knew exactly what it was—Carmilla’s phone number—and groaned audibly in frustration. Clearly her attempt to distract herself wasn’t working. The girl went to tear up the note, the number already safely entered into her phone’s contacts. Laura stacked up the two scraps, about to further reduce the paper into shreds, when the chance placement of her thumb over the woman’s name immediately caught her attention. With a portion of the name obscured, the paper read “L-L-A”.

_Carmilla. Mircalla._

Everything dawned on the brunette at once. Laura slowly tore up the rest of the note, this time taking care to isolate each individual letter. Her suspicions were confirmed once the scraps had been rearranged: “Carmilla” and “Mircalla” were anagrams of one another. That couldn’t be a coincidence, could it? Her instincts told her that everything she had learned had to be connected in some way, and she was going to find out exactly how. Laura grabbed her phone and wallet and made for the door to her apartment. Her plan was to head to the library and hopefully run into the woman again, whatever her real name was. And if that didn’t work, she had no choice but to call and hope that the woman wouldn’t just ignore the unknown number.

_\---_

Out on the streets, cars honked and people pushed into each other as everyone focused on getting to where they needed to be. Laura thought back on when she first met the woman at the subway station. The only classes offered at the university so early in the morning were lectures, which all began and finished at around the same time. The girl checked her watch, and was given an extra boost of courage knowing that she happened to pick the most opportune time to try and confront the woman.

Laura was about a block away from her subway station when a police cruiser with its lights flashing pulled over onto the side of the street. By the time the lights had been shut off, Laura spotted a motorcyclist not far ahead, most likely the person that had been pulled over. When the rider removed their helmet and jet-black hair came tumbling down, Laura nearly collided with someone who was looking at their phone. She apologized profusely and moved away from the street to stand by the doorway of a small grocery store. In the shade of the awning, she watched as the very woman she had been meaning to talk to drummed her fingers on the tank of the motorcycle while the police officer approached. Laura pretended to be reading something on her phone while she waited for the officer to chew out the woman and leave.

When the brunette looked up, the woman had already put her helmet back on and was preparing to leave. Laura approached the woman, swallowing all her emotions, and felt her stomach drop when the rider turned to face the brunette before she could say anything.

“Laura?”

“Hey Carmilla. Or should I call you Mircalla?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Whatever you’re about to say, stop and rethink it. I can already tell that you’re lying because your helmet is on just fine, but you’re still fidgeting with it. I want the truth, Carmilla.”

The older woman sighed and removed her helmet, placing it in front of her and balancing it delicately so that it wouldn’t slide off the curve of the motorcycle’s gas tank. She slid her gloves off and crammed them into the pockets of her riding jacket before crossing her arms across her chest.

“How much do you want to know?”

“All of it.”

Carmilla furrowed her brows. She looked incredibly tired, and part of Laura felt sorry for her. But another part of her, the instinct that had kept her alive in all the bad situations she had found herself in, reminded Laura that Carmilla had been deceiving her from the start. Laura could understand why the woman might want to lie to her, especially when it came to a secret that was anywhere as dangerous as Laura suspected Carmilla’s was, but that didn’t stop the truth from stinging.

“Can we sit down someplace? I have a lot to tell you.”

“Of course,” Laura replied, softening her tone once she heard how small the other woman sounded. Carmilla put the kickstand back down and went to remove the key, but was confused when she saw that it wasn’t there anymore. Laura had removed it when the woman wasn’t looking, fearing that she might try to ride away and avoid the conversation.

“Sorry,” the brunette said as she handed the keys back. “I didn’t know if you were going to try to run or not.”

Carmilla looked at Laura and smiled the smallest, saddest smile the girl had ever seen. “I’ve learned that running gets me nowhere.”

Laura had no response, so she waited for Carmilla to gather her belongings and lock up her bike before they started walking down the sidewalk. As they moved through the stream of people in silence, the girl’s attention was focused on every step they took while she tried to figure out where Carmilla was taking her. After a short walk, they ended up outside the door to an apartment complex. Laura’s confusion was picked up by the woman immediately.

“This is my apartment. We don’t have to go up, but it’s the safest place I know of in the city.”

“How’s that?”

“No-one knows that I live here.”

“Then why did you bring me here?”

“Because I want you to know that you can trust me, Laura.” Carmilla stood there, waiting patiently as Laura weighed considered probability of being brutally murdered without anyone to around find out about it. Realizing she was overreacting, the girl eventually decided to give Carmilla a chance, and indicated her decision to the woman a small nod of her head. Carmilla smiled softly, then entered a code in the keypad.

“How safe can this place be if I now know the passcode to your apartment?”

“You’ll see.”

Laura was yet to be convinced, but followed along patiently. When they entered the lobby, Carmilla led them past the elevators and down a corridor, much to the girl’s confusion. They turned left at the end of the hallway, and Carmilla began to explain herself.

“I studied the blueprints of numerous apartments throughout the city before choosing this building. There are two main elevators that function just like you’d expect, stopping at every floor. However, there’s one section of the thirteenth floor that can only be accessed using the particular service elevator that we’re headed to. The space most likely used to be some sort of private living space for whoever built this place. My neighbors are mostly wealthy elderly couples, so they don’t notice that the square footage doesn’t quite add up.”

“So, no-one uses this elevator?” Laura asked as they finally arrived at a single, plain lift. It looked just like the others in the lobby.

“Nope. I essentially bought this elevator for myself. This one was barely used by the staff to begin with because it’s so out of the way.” Carmilla entered another code into a keypad that was installed in the metal panel where the usual floor buttons would have been. “And this is my own keypad, so I can change the code as many times as I like. There’s also a thumbprint scanner beneath the panel if I ever feel like I need more security.”

Laura was impressed. Carmilla had put more thought into her living situation than Laura had initially given her credit for. The elevator began speeding upwards, and the two stood in silence. When they came to a rest and the metal doors slid open, the raven-haired woman motioned for Laura to go first. The girl stepped out into the hallway and immediately noticed how short it was. There was only one door, with no numbers or marking of any sort.

“I promise it’s less creepy once you’re inside,” Carmilla said. Laura smiled at the comment, then remembered why they were here. She wiped her face clean once more, mentally preparing herself for the conversation that was to come.

 

* * *

 

_Listen While You Read: "Alibi" by BANKS_

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Laura had a few friends from the university that had pretty nice apartments. But she had never seen anything quite as jaw-dropping as the room she had just entered. The high windows of the loft apartment brought a pleasant amount of light in, and combined with the exposed concrete and hardwood, the whole place had a functional yet warm feel to it. The furnishings were simple, but Laura could tell that they weren’t as cheap as her own self-serve warehouse furniture. The apartment was very open, with no walls separating the kitchen, living room, and dining area. A staircase led up to a loft where Carmilla’s bed was. Folding screens partitioned most of what would be considered the bedroom and created privacy, but the only real room was the bathroom. It reminded Laura of her own little apartment, just much bigger, safer, and more expensive.

After Carmilla had set down her belongings and taken off her jacket, she slumped down on the couch in the middle of the living room. Laura stood standing with her arms crossed, suddenly feeling out of place in Carmilla’s home.

“Please, sit down. You might collapse if you tried to stand the entire time I explained things,” the woman said. As the brunette reluctantly found a place at the other end of the couch, the woman seated across from her unbuckled her boots and set them aside before bringing her legs up beside her. Carmilla grabbed a pillow and hugged it to her chest. Laura was taken back by how ordinary the woman looked. Stripped of her challenging attitude and self-assured air, she could have been any other person on the street. But she wasn’t just another stranger on her way to school or work. Carmilla was anything but ordinary, and that’s why they were sitting here in her apartment with a stiff silence between them.

Laura watched as the woman chewed on the inside of her lip, staring at some object on the opposite wall. She was obviously lost in thought, so Laura waited. She had gotten used to waiting, so it couldn’t hurt to wait a little more. Eventually, Carmilla broke the silence.

“Where do you want me to start?”

“The beginning. I want to know everything.”

Carmilla had switched to picking at her fingernails. “It’s kind of a lot, you know.”

“That’s fine. I just want to hear the truth. I’ve got time,” Laura insisted. The brunette waited as the woman across from her decided where it was best to begin.

“Alright, so. I guess it started about 7 years ago,” Carmilla started, hugging the throw pillow closer. “I grew up in an extremely wealthy family as an only child. Both my parents were skilled lawyers and made quite a bit of money. They usually worked as a team. My mother was the one that did all the talking when it came to court trials, but they really wouldn't have gotten to be so famous without each other. Everyone expected me to follow in their footsteps and be the next Karnstein, but I wanted nothing to do with it. I didn’t want to be admired and respected just because my parents were. I was fourteen when I realized that they didn’t care much for my own aspirations, and only hoped that I would follow theirs. I felt invisible and I didn’t know how else to deal with the situation I was in, so I packed a bag and ran away from home as soon as I could. Somehow I made it here, to Silas.

“It was rough when I first arrived. I was sleeping on the streets, living off of anything I could find. Sometimes a sympathetic family would take me in for a week or two if I was lucky, and I wasn’t. One night, I was looking for a place to sleep when I wandered into the wrong alleyway. I didn’t know which spaces were already taken, which normally wasn’t a problem. People would just let me know and I’d be on my way, or they’d offer to share their space until I was able to move along. That night was different. The man there, he had already lost it. Living on the streets for so long had taken its toll on him. I realized this as soon as I saw him, and I tried to turn and leave as quietly as I could, but he ended up noticing me anyways. By the time I looked back, he was up and running and had me tackled to the ground. I can’t remember what else happened, except that while we were struggling he suddenly just stopped moving, his whole body weight slumping on top of me. It was like he had fallen asleep, and for a moment I was too confused to understand what had happened. When I shoved him off and crawled out from underneath his weight, I realized that I was covered in blood. I panicked, thinking that it was mine, and then I lost it when I discovered that it wasn’t. I thought I had killed him by accident.

“Next thing I remember, some stranger had thrown a thick coat over me and was telling me to stand up. The woman calmly asked me what my name was, like there wasn’t some homeless guy bleeding out on the ground next to me. That’s when I quickly came up with the anagram ‘Mircalla.’ Carmilla is my real name, but I wanted to separate myself from my family. I never gave her my last name either because I was afraid she might recognize it. She told me that I could come with her if I liked, and I did, without hesitation. I recall falling asleep in a nice car, worrying momentarily about staining the expensive interior before dozing off, but that’s about it. When we arrived at this massive, underground compound, she introduced me to the other kids she had taken in. They all referred to her as Mother, so that’s what I call her; no-one knows her real name, and none of us have ever thought to ask. All of our stories are the same: she showed up one night when we were in a tough situation, and offered us a new life. None of us turned her offer down and joined her without a second thought. I get chills thinking back on how eerie it all seems, to be honest. It’s like we couldn’t refuse her, but we didn’t want to either.”

Laura had been listening the entire time, rapt with attention. The information was a lot to absorb, but she wanted Carmilla to continue. She was beginning to see everything fall into place, like going to the eye doctor and only then realizing you weren’t seeing everything clearly.

The woman continued. “Over the next several years, she trained me and the other kids she had taken in. Mother never failed to remind us that we were all a family now, and the recruits came to refer to each other as siblings. The idea was never forced upon us; we just generally accepted whatever we were told. As you might have already guessed by now, Mother trained us how to fight, and how to kill. She also brought in tutors to formally educate us, which is why I’m able to attend the university here in Silas. She took a special interest in me because both the training and academic lessons came to me with great ease. I quickly rose up in the ranks and became one of her right-hand assassins, and Mother began to teach me about the inner workings of the organization. She eventually trusted me enough to let me come and go from the compound as I pleased. None of us felt trapped there or anything, but it was still a large responsibility to be allowed to venture into the city.

“By that time, I had completed a handful of contracts, and had made quite a bit of my own money. In case you’re wondering, yes, I’ve had to kill people before. I’ve learned to not let it bother me, because the contracts usually consist of corrupt CEOs that the world isn’t going to miss. And I didn’t have time to worry about whose life I was taking, or I would have gotten myself killed.

“Sometimes I would find out that the person I had been assigned to eliminate hadn’t done anything wrong, and was merely a target because someone wealthy would benefit if they were to disappear. There was no way for me to try and save these people without Mother somehow finding out, so I never attempted to. I eventually gave up on the notion altogether, and just focused on doing what I was told. With the money I was making, I was able to move out and pay for this apartment. It wasn’t furnished or as it is now, but it was something. And it was out of Mother’s reach. This place eventually became my safe haven, and I started spending less and less time at the compound. That didn’t concern Mother, as she would usually just get one of my siblings to contact me if I ever had a new contract.

“After a while, it started to feel like Mother didn’t have as much of a hold over me as she used to. I started to do my own thing, even enrolling in the university as a full-time student. For a while I kept to myself and didn’t talk to anyone. I didn’t live on campus, so it was easy to avoid other students. But this one girl, Ell, she always sat next to me in psychology. She always asked me how my day was going and tried to get me to open up. I never budged, but I loved listening to her talk about herself. I didn’t have an ordinary life, so it was nice to escape my own reality for a while.”

Laura noticed the small smile spread across Carmilla’s face as she began to digress somewhat from her story. The girl didn’t have the heart to bring herself to point out that they had gone off topic, so she listened to Carmilla talk about Ell. The woman was practically glowing, and Laura did her best not to think about how she would be content to sit listening to her for as long as time permitted.

“One day, Ell convinced me to study with her after class. It was probably the first time I had spent free time with anyone other than a sibling at the compound. We did little more than homework, but I had never felt so at peace before. She still tried to get me to open up, but in ways that I wasn’t even aware of. She would talk about some of her favorite authors, and without realizing it I would have explained how much I loved philosophy and that I was thinking of switching over to it for my major. Or she’d talk about going on long car rides with her dad as a kid, and I’d suddenly find myself talking about how much I wanted a motorcycle. I had never really been into art before, but she quoted this TV show she had been trying to get me to watch. One of the characters said that ‘art is love made public,’ and I could see in her eyes how much that one line resonated within her.

“Our first date was at a small pop-up art gallery. It was nothing extravagant, but I can still recall every last detail of it. She bought me a print she had noticed me admiring, and I’ve kept it ever since. She just—she knew me so well. Like I never had to say very much, and Ell would still know how I was feeling and what I was thinking. Or almost everything that I was thinking. I never told her anything meaningful about myself, like why I sometimes had to leave in the middle of a date without a proper explanation, or why she wouldn’t hear from me for weeks on end at times. But she never asked questions, she just trusted that I would tell her if it was important. I think it was her trust in me that hurt the most, in the end. Because once someone trusts you, there’s nothing you can do to protect them.”

Carmilla’s demeanor had gone from wistful to pained, and Laura could see that the woman’s eyes had glossed over. Her knuckles were white from gripping the pillow so tightly. Laura had to look anywhere but at the tense figure in front of her, the threat of tears was so overwhelming. The girl had always been deeply moved by other people’s hardships.

“Ell had me up on a pedestal, and I couldn’t keep the confidence I got from being with her from spilling over into the other parts of my life. I started to interfere with Mother’s plans in the smallest ways possible. She never could figure out what was making contracts so difficult to fulfill for her assassins. I eventually became more and more brazen, forcing some missions to fail altogether. I was getting a new rush from working against Mother and helping people to safety.

“It angered me that I couldn’t help everyone, so I tried to focus on what I’d been able to accomplish. It didn’t always help. One day, Ell and I were browsing through some small bookstore when she brought up something she had seen on the news that morning. A man that had been reported missing turned out to be her friend’s father, and the news had Ell on the verge of a breakdown. It broke me to see her like that, because I knew that I had been the one to hurt her. The man in the news had been a recent contract of mine, and I hadn’t been able to do anything to prevent the inevitable. I managed to calm Ell down, but something inside me clicked that day. I wasn’t doing enough to stop innocent people from getting hurt, and the girl standing in front of me, taking shaky breaths to prevent herself from crying, was proof of that.

“There’s this ancient law that all the contracts must follow. So long as the target remained within the boundaries of the city, they were fair game. But once they left Silas, they were safe from all harm. The rule never made sense to me until I did a little digging. Mother’s organization must have been passed down to her through many successors, because from what I know, the law is just as old as the city itself. It was established to keep the power of the clan from getting out of hand and taking over neighboring towns and cities. It already had Silas in its grip, a mere town at the time, and there needed to be a way to stop the corruption from spreading. Mother follows this law religiously, almost like it would do her physical harm if one of us were to defy its stipulations.

“For all of the people I had managed to free from Mother’s grasp, I had taken advantage of this rule. I let the targets know that they were in danger, and often times they left the city before my siblings ever found out that they suspected their demise. Mother never found out, so I thought that there was no reason why I couldn’t do the same for my own targets.

“When I was given my next contract, I was informed that one of my siblings had been partnered up with me. We were to eliminate a middle-aged married couple that would be in the city for the weekend. They seemed to be there on leisure, so I assumed that Mother wouldn’t be quite so mad if they managed to slip away. I should have known better right from the start: as a high priestess, a high-ranking assassins, I was never given low profile contracts. And to top it all off,  my work was cut out for me, because it was difficult for me to get away from my partner whenever we were out in the city.

“Eventually, I managed to tip the couple off. At first, they didn’t seem to believe that they were in danger, but then they made last-minute plans to leave earlier than Mother’s information had indicated. On the day that they were to depart, I managed to get the husband out of the city, but my partner completed her half of the contract before I could stop her. I had been furious about my failure. My partner assumed that it was because I had seemingly let my target get away, but really it was the exact opposite.

“That evening, Mother summoned me. I assumed that it would be the usual scolding that she doled out whenever one of my siblings screwed something up. I knew right away I was wrong when I found a large number of my clanmates gathered in the main hall. I remember a chill settled in between the absolute silence, and the hairs stood up on my arms and neck. Mother was waiting for my arrival, and once I stopped moving, two of my brothers had me restrained in the an instant. I could have snapped their wrists, but I stopped struggling as soon as Mother ordered someone to be brought in. Even with the hood over her head, I could tell it was Ell, just by the way she held herself high even when the weight of the world was crushing down on her.”

By this point, Laura could see silent tears streaming down Carmilla’s face. The woman was too engrossed in the story to notice, and Laura almost felt uncomfortable when she looked at her, as if she were intruding on something private.

“Somehow, Mother had found out about all the work I had done to disrupt the intricate machine that she sat at the heart of, like a spider waiting patiently in her web while some unfortunate insect tries to escape. But the fact that I had been found out wasn’t important to me anymore. What mattered was that Mother somehow knew about Ell. One of my brothers gave me a sly look that let me know that he had been the one to let the secret out. I had words like venom ready at the tip of my tongue, but they disappeared the moment Mother removed Ell’s hood. When she locked eyes with me, her expression changed from relief to bitter hatred and betrayal. They must have told her everything.

“Before I could even register how much it hurt to have someone I cared so much about turn against me, the same clanmate that had exposed me to Mother took Ell’s life. Just like that, she was gone. Watching the light drain from her eyes made me feel like I had shattered into millions of tiny pieces. Mother pursued no further punishment. She allowed me to keep my rank within the clan as well as my freedom, because she knew I would never do anything to defy her ever again. I remember sitting there on the stone floor, unable to move. I’m not sure how much time had passed before one of my siblings came to get me. She was the same one that had been partnered with me on the contract. Over the next few weeks, she made sure I got up to eat and get minimal amounts of exercise. Without her, I would have just let myself slip away.

“Three years have passed since I lost Ell. It doesn’t hurt quite so much to think about her anymore, but I don’t think I could ever forget about what happened. I didn’t want Mother to ever have that sort of control over me ever again, so I shut everyone out. I kept to myself like I used to, but for different reasons now. And it worked, for the most part. Even my own siblings gave me space. I fell back into a normal routine, going to school several days a week and diligently following Mother’s orders. I should have known better than to think that everything would be normal after what happened.”

Carmilla seemed to have reached the end of her story, but Laura still had unanswered questions. She was stunned from everything she had just been told, and the two women sat in silence on the couch for quite some time while the girl tried to process the information. Carmilla had finally noticed her own tears and used the cuff of her t-shirt sleeve to dry her face. Laura waited for the woman to finish what she was doing before she said anything.

“So, Ell is—Ell’s—”

“She’s dead.”

“Oh.” Laura fidgeted where she was sitting, shifting her legs out from underneath her and wincing at the prickling sensation from the blood returning to her extremities.

“So, who’s Nosferatu?”

“That’s the organization I’ve been a part of since I was 14.”

“And that dinner, that was another contract being set up?”

Carmilla sighed before responding. “Yes. And I had to leave the coffee shop early that day because Mother needed me for something else.”

“Was that ‘something else’ the man in the alleyway?”

“Sort of. He was only part of a larger problem. Not unlike me, really.”

“Don’t say that, Carm. You didn’t have a choice."

“And what makes you think he did? Look at me, Laura. I’ve used hopelessness as an excuse for all the awful things that I’ve done. I _did_ have a choice. I didn’t need to be the cause of so many destroyed lives and broken families,” Carmilla retorted. When the woman saw that Laura didn’t have a response, she stood up and padded over to the kitchen to pour herself a glass of water. She stood with her back to the counter, observing the girl on the sofa.

“I’m sorry you had to hear all of that.”

“Don’t be. I’m glad that you opened up to me. It couldn’t have been easy,” Laura replied, smiling softly.

“You’re not mad?”

“How could I be? Like I said before, you didn’t really have a say in where you ended up. And how could I be mad at someone who saved my life?”

“Saved your life?” the woman practically laughed. “I’m surprised I didn’t crack any of your ribs after that fight we had.”

“No, I’m talking about the time before that.”

“There was a time before that?”

“You don’t remember? A man was about to shoot me. And somehow you left that warning and money, which I’m now assuming is for a plane ticket or some other way out of the city. I’m not sure how or why you tracked me down, and I appreciate your concern for my safety, but I can’t leave the city, not now.”

“Laura, what are you talking about?”

“You left one of your knives in my kitchen table—which I still haven’t been able to remove by the way—with an envelope pinned underneath. There was a note that read ‘You aren’t safe here,’ and a few thousand dollars in cash,” Laura explained. When she saw that Carmilla was becoming increasingly confused, she pulled her phone out of her pocket to find a picture of the sketch of the knife’s engraving. She turned the screen to face Carmilla.

“This is the logo that was on the knife. It’s on the ones I saw you wearing when we fought, and the man at the restaurant was holding a business card with the same exact emblem, which I’m assuming came from you.”

“Laura, whoever was in your apartment, it wasn’t me. I wasn’t even aware of your existence before we met at the subway station.”

“Wait, but if you didn’t leave the warning, who did? And how am I in danger?”

Carmilla’s face darkened. “I’m not sure. But we need to find out soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly I've lost track of how late this chapter is. Hopefully it was worth the wait.


End file.
